I wanted to share a side-hobby of mine with you. I haven’t discussed it much because I didn’t want to intimidate all of you who may already be slightly overwhelmed by my many successes, skills, and innate talents. Also, it’s totally not a big deal. It’s just that I feel I’ve made some important progress in this one project and the implications are pretty substantial to the good people of America. So I do feel it an ethical obligation to share with you all.
Over the past few years, I have managed to become a pretty prominent and highly respected ethnographer in my spare time. I know, I know, spare time?! I just don’t sleep a lot naturally, and I figured I was already such an adept cross-cultural communicator, thoughtful in my observations, nuanced in my thinking, etc., etc., that taking the next step to conducting full on, methodological, social science-based ethnographies just seemed natural. Anyhoo, it’s really no big deal, but if for whatever crazy reason, you are more interested in what that means, you can check out the Union of American Ethnographers website where I was recently profiled because of their annual award I won.
Blah blah blah, what’s really important though is the study that I’ve been conducting to examine one of the most glaring, potentially dangerous, and taboo conflicts that’s brewing right under our noses. Obviously, what I’m referring to are the historic tensions between the Employeds and Unemployeds. Now obviously, these tensions have had cycles of hot and cold periods of conflict over time. But it’s gotten pretty frightening in recent years, and if tensions continue to escalate as they are, I’m afraid we may be looking at full on violent conflict between the two groups. Some restaurants have gone so far as to push back happy hours to begin only after 5:00pm in an effort to subtly--and purportedly legally--prevent the Unemployeds from going to their bars during the day, sitting there, drinking, and looking sad and ugly. Clearly, policies and trends like this are egregious and discriminatory.
I felt like we were reaching a critical juncture of pressure between these two populations, and that we really needed to understand this historical divide and its effects if we ever wanted to address it and deal with it non-violently. So, for the past few months, in an effort to understand the Unemployeds, I’ve engaged in an ethnographic study of them. Like any good student of Geertz, Evans-Pritchard, and Whyte, I’ve tried to incorporate myself into their communities, to take on their habits, and to blend into their environment as much as possible in order to observe and understand their culture.
For the past three months, I have only worn clothes that are either out of style or purchased off of the sale racks at Urban Outfitters. I’ve spent time in hipster coffee shops pretending to be a struggling “writer.” I’ve even spent numerous full days holed up in my apartment, filled with hours of crying interspersed with Dr. Phil episodes, so as to get a better grip on the true psyche of the Unemployeds. It’s been grueling and quite the sacrifice, but I do feel like I’m finally making some headway in my study.
Based on my observational research, I am in the process of drafting a guide to their culture, habits, and languages. I hope this study will help break down the many negative stereotypes that exist between these two populations. We all know these stereotypes far too well: People think Employeds are responsible, punctual, reliable, and typically busy between 9am and 5pm on weekdays. Many assume they have a steady source of income, are often insured, and dine out regularly. Unemployeds are assumed to be poor, often idle between 9am and 5pm on weekdays, needy wastes of space, completely lacking in any useful skills, embarrassments to society, heavy drinkers, and brooding artists. Clearly many of these are unfair stereotypes that need to be disproved once and for all.
The study that I will present to you will, I hope, help us along the path of better understanding both populations entrenched in this dangerous rivalry. I will review the different behaviors, socializations, habits, and languages. As our understanding improves, we’ll grapple with recommendations to prevent the shunning of Unemployeds and their peaceful reintegration into society.
I hope you’ll check back in as I present my findings from this very timely and important research.
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